For most people the motive for attracting a partner is based around filling a void. Attempting to fill that void with an outside source is equivalent to trying to fill in a bottomless pit. You can keep trying to fill the pit, but no matter how much you put in the pit, it is never enough. If you feel like you “need” a partner in your life as opposed to “wanting” a partner, more than likely you will develop an unhealthy dependency on that person.
The key to attracting a healthy partnership in your life is developing a better relationship with yourself. Learn how to be more comfortable going to the movies alone, going out to dinner alone, exploring local events that stimulate you alone. In the midst of exploring on your own, you will be surprised how many interesting people you will meet who have similar interests. You don’t find love, it finds you, but if you’re lost in hiding even from yourself, how can love find you?
The more comfortable you become with enjoying yourself by yourself, the more confidence you will exude. Healthy potential partners are drawn to people who are confident and secure. Unhealthy potential partners prey on people with low self-esteem. You automatically attract a reflection of how you feel about yourself. This is universal law.
So, go out and explore. Focus more on enjoying life by yourself and you will attract someone with whom to enjoy life. YOU are the delicious dessert, your partner is only the icing on the cake. You are a treat to be discovered. Remember, the most important relationship is the one you have with yourself first.
Jason Hairston
I appreciated that. You hit some awesome points.
Sexual Energy Is Everywhere:
By making a natural function sound like an objectionable act, we are driving love away. Up until now, all of human culture has been against sex, against passion. This opposition, this negation, has shattered & destroyed the possibility of the birth of love in humans. The truth is that sex is the starting point of all journeys to love. Sex is the source, the origin of the flow of love. When you attack sex, you attack the very source, & the flow is stopped there. It is sexual energy that ultimately transforms & transmutes into love. The evolution of love is nothing but transformed sex energy.
Coal To dimond: There is no essential difference between coal & a diamond. But coal is not considered important. When coal is kept in a house, it is stored in a place where it cannot be seen by guests, whereas diamonds are worn around the neck so that everybody can see them. Diamonds & coal are the same; but there seems no visible relationship between the two that they are two points on a journey made by the same element. If you are against coal – because at the first glance it has nothing more to offer than black soot – the possibility of its transformation into a diamond ends right there.
Coal never becomes a diamond because the acceptance that is needed for its evolution, for its process of transformation, is out of the question. How can something to which we have become inimical, to which we are opposed, with which we are continuously fighting, be transformed? On the surface, human beings are taught to support the dropping of all conflicts, fights & struggles, but deep down they are essential being taught to fight, “Sex is sin, so fight against it.” And on the surface, we are asked to drop all conflicts.
It is very important to understand one thing in this context. Human beings can never be separated from sex. Sex is the primary point of one’s life; one is born out of it. Existence has accepted the energy of sex as the energy of sex as the starting point of creation. And your holy men call it sinful…something that existence itself does not consider a sin! If God considers sex as sin, then there is no greater sinner than God in universe.
Flower In Bloom: You see a flower in bloom. Have you ever considered that the blossoming of a flower is an act of passion, a sexual act? What is happening as the flower blossoms? The butterflies will sit on it & carry its pollen, its sperm, to another flower. A peacock dances in full glory, a poet will sing songs to it, your saints will also be filled with joy about it – but aren’t they aware that the dance is also an overt expression of passion, that it is primarily a sexual act? The peacock is dancing to woo its beloved. The papiha bird is singing; the cuckoo is singing, a boy has become an adolescent; a girl has grown into a beautiful woman. These are all expressions & manifestations of sexual energy. All life, all expression, all flowering is basically sex energy…
While blessing a newly wed couple, an Upanishadic sage said to the bride, “May you be the mother of ten children &, ultimately, may your husband become your eleventh child.”
If passion is transformed, the wife can become the mother; if lust is transformed, sex can become love. it is only sexual energy that flowers into the energy of love. But we have filled humans with antagonism towards sex, & the result is that not only has love not flowered in them – because love is an evolution beyond sexual energy & can come only through acceptance of it – but their minds have become more & more sexual because of this opposition to sex. Birth of love is possible only when we free ourselves of this opposition.!