Modern Americans have our energy hooked up to news in an interesting way. We direct our energy as to create more and more of the news we don’t like. We don’t allow the news to push us further, develop solutions or solve problems. Do allow me to explain:
Something happens. It’s an unsavory thing, or so we are led to believe. We hook into shaming and blaming the “culprit”. We toss our energy into complaining about what this Villain has done, it’s terrible, it’s so foolish, it’s nasty, it’s irresponsible… thereby creating more of it! What we focus on expands.
Here is a Progressive Way to look at news like the latest incident, Too $hort and his candid sex advise for young boys. Decide what you feel about this:
In terms of educating our youth not just on the clinical process of sex, but how to be good partners, caring lovers, and sensually activated adults, we certainly could use more effort and creativity. There is a huge void not being filled, except by porn, in regards to our children learning “How To” engage sensual interaction. Google notes ages 8-18 are the highest rated group in terms of porn consumption online!
Enter Too Short telling boys to pin girls to the wall and find their clitoris, and POW! Everyone directs their energy to crucifying him instead of finding/feeling the wake up call. Who taught us to focus on the negative and discard the learning, in life? Keep in mind everything that happens, happens for a reason, a divine purpose. To be specific, we are always being called to the moral of our stories, even when it hurts to realize it.
The moral to this story is simple. Back to the void. If our children want to know about how to have sex, where can they turn. Can you imagine your child asking you, Mom, Dad, how can I bring a woman to orgasm? Or your daughter saying – mother, how can I have a clitoral orgasm, and are there more orgasms to be explored? I’ve heard about the G-spot orgasm and female ejaculation…
No? You can’t imagine that? Well, nor can most of them, due to the current cultural climate. Therein creates the void – Billions of children who want to know how to be lovers, but do not have a direct route to finding out from any responsible adult, by and large.
So the moment the seething, gaping, void becomes filled with what we consider to be ‘the wrong thing’ we flip out on the “bad guy”, instead of peering into life in a divine way, assessing the news with our higher minds, and taking notice of the moral to this story.
We do this with all news. Tiger Woods, crucify him! Forget the moral to the story ie. American marriages are not working on a massive scale; there is cheating on a massive scale. Or Newt Gingridge, kill him! Forget the fact many partners are lying to one another – 66% of American marriages are riddled with adulterous affairs. It goes on and on. We’re addicted to finding the negative instead of productively using news to spur solutions.
We plug our energy into the wrong hemisphere of a story. We give credence to the fear mongers and make the machine stronger! Why? Is it we’re unaware problems don’t solve themselves, and reality is showing us what needs to be shifted? Have we forgotten the purpose of life? Have we forgotten all things serve to further?
I have not. Progressive Love has not. These four principles:
- No Shame No Blame
- No Victims No Villains
- No Cop Outs No Drop Outs
- The prupose is Growth, the benefit is love
These are what we must begin to use as filters as we read and watch the news! No I will not shame and blame Too Short. He is just a messenger. He is simply filling a void we refuse to fill on a national level pertaining to our children and their tireless longing to be taught to be adults, sensually and otherwise.
I did this video about the messenger Tiger Woods like three years ago! Don’t laugh at my hair… But the same applies here:
Instead of tying my energy up in bad mouthing Too Short, I’d soul search by asking “What Can I do to fill that void?” How can I plug my energy into ways to begin giving young adults what they need so Phantoms don’t have more access than I? Too Short was actually, energetically, sacrificing himself, his reputation, unbeknownst to him, to bring attention to the needs of our youth. Our clinical sex ed is surely failing them. Too Short is a hero right now!
Thanks Too Short, I applaud you, not for being clueless as to how to please a woman, not for advising young boys to follow your ridiculous sex plan, but for bringing attention to the void modern education has left between young adults and proper sex training. With your obtuse vision you ‘made a mistake’ that is priceless to eyes that can SEE. Indeed we parents have created and allowed to stand a void. Indeed you brought or attention there.
Because of you Too Short, we might choose to become adult enough to find the moral to the story, direct our energy properly, and bring light to the world of our children. I think we must.
Again thank you for causing the mindful to glance your way and make new choices on how to fill the void. Personally, I’ve already written the new sex curriculum for young girls. Who will write the one for young boys?
Love and Delight,
Kenya K Stevens
Love and Delight
Kenya K Stevens
I understand where you’re coming from. But Too Short may not have even been trying to sexually educate young boys/youth because our culture keeps us from being with them. If that was the case, where’s the advice for young girls about how to sexually please those boys? Those girls he’s telling boys to put up against a wall are the same girls that those same boys will soon label as “hoes.”
I’m not sure if Too Short has daughters, but would he allow them the same sexual freedom as the boys? I doubt it. Society’s men tend to expect boys to be sexually experienced while the girls are supposed to remain virginal…but then who are the boys to have sexual experiences with? I appreciate your positive spin on things, but there’s a double standard underneath Too Short’s comments.
This article is not about Too Shorts “obtuse” and senseless advise to boys, it’s about seeing this issue for what it is and addressing it, thanking too short for bringing this to national attention, the fact that no one is teaching our youth to be good partners, good lovers, good friends. xo
Too Short’s comments invoke and support rape culture period. To observe that his comments are obtuse and senseless and then ask readers to “see this for what it is” is deeply troubling. What it “is” is a grown man provoking and encouraging young boys toward sexual assault. The behavior he advocates could have young brothers catching a case. We’re not crucifying Too Short — but it seems to be okay to let him encourage behavior that can crucify the spirits of young girls. He does not deserve a thank you for bringing this to national attention as the need for comprehensive education around these issues has been in the forefront for some time now and is a mainstay on politically progressive agendas. Our children need healthy love and examples of healthy, CONSENSUAL sexuality –agreed. But here we go again letting a brotha off the hook and leaving our daughters and sons in the lurch. Senseless.
I think this article is absolutely brilliant because Kenya sees the big picture.
When I first saw the video I just shook my head and called him a perv but after reading this article I now have a deeper understanding as to why she thanks him, I do as well, not because of what he said but because of the chain reaction it will cause.
If young mothers have not talked to their daughters about sex, after having watched this video I guarantee they are going to say something to them about it NOW. What this perv did was open the door to communication between parents and their children about sex. I wish my mother could of heard this perv when I was in school because I am sure she would of then talked to me about sex as opposed to what she actually did which was not say a word. Her logic? If I don’t talk to her about it she won’t do it and I learned from guys like Too $hort how sex would be for me up until my 30s. I for one am glad.
Thank you perv!!! lol For real!
GREAT Article. I love the way you get to the REAL message of what is being conveyed. Great Job JuJu Mama.
Great piece Kenya K. I agree totally and completely.
Kenya is out of her fucking mind!
I’m most definitly out of my western mind and into something higher…
No need to thank 2Short’s demented mentoring for continuing an conversation of little interest to the masses: expendable black women bodies. Unequivocally, progressively, egregious lyrics, acts and videos, by hip hop artist, have bombard our youth through promoting self-sexualization and hypersexualizing of very young boys and girls. We are so guilty of glamorizing and marketing black pathology — young girls believe they’re only worthy of achieving the black hoe or bitch status. And Black boys learn early that their only alternative to economic success is measured by reckless hypersexualized behavior . So, still today, black female bodies are still on the auction block for sale; this time by black patriarchal auctioneers.
Why cant you acknowledge the need to have open dialogue abt sex without applauding a man who gave young boys advice on how to sexually assault young girls! There is no progressive love in forcing girls to submit to the sexual will of a boy nor does it bring pleasure. I respect your right to pursue your pleasure as a CONSENTING adult. But Too Shorts misogny defies the very values you claim to cherish
I watched you on Dr Phil yesterday and must say congratulations on being the most proud whore I’ve ever witnessed. You have confirmed my suspicions of your delusion by giving props to Too Short, as though he’s spoken to the educational benefit of boys or girls. As much as you & Carl fanaticize about a world without them, STDs DO exist, and your irresponsible behavior fuels the spread of them.
I feel sorry for your children. None of them will know the joy of a meaningful relationship with one person. You’ll be grandparents – probably many times over – within a few years. You are raising sons who will believe it okay to abandon their wife and children to run the streets, because that’s what they saw daddy do. Your daughter won’t understand why she’s called every name but a child of God, because she’s taken after her mother. I pray Child Protective Services grants your mother-in-law or some other sane being custody of your children in hopes they can lead healthy lives.
I already know you’ve written 14 books, 300 articles, survived cancer and a burned house. Oh and – who could not note – attended Howard. Good for you; you can save it. Unfortunately, all the book sense in your head doesn’t afford you the common sense to realize you are still a whore.
Well thank you very much. I am glad you got that out. What I know for sure is that which is like unto itself is drawn. Welcome to Jujumama! I’m sure you’ll read more and enjoy. xo
I love my reflection in you.
Kenya xoxo
This is absolutely DISGUSTING and sad that you think b/c your views are outside of the western culture, it’s the truth. Your thinking is in no way, shape, or form NEW. I don’t care where I lived or was from, something inside of me says this is wrong. Just like that gut feeling you had at first when your husband introduced you to this “new” (although not new at all) way of thinking/marriage. I’m pretty sure he’s sitting back laughing with his “partners” at you and how you are basically carrying this ideology for him. Please don’t make your children (or others) a pawn like yourself.
I love my husband and I love my marriage. We all sit back and laugh sometimes at how we’ve over ridden the rediculous western conspet of love and created something more beautiful and luscious to enjoy together.
I invite you to read more on my blog. xo
(Dag this won’t let me correct spellings. sorry about the tyops)